The ragged
shirt I wore danced in the wind, though I felt nothing on my skin. I stared
around the burning empty clearing. Ruins decorated the field. A once proud
tower now reduced to a heaping pile of scorched concrete. Desolation screamed
in every corner, every crevice; but the devastation could not hold me gaze. My
attention was turned forward to a woman who stood in black.
Her entire
body was covered in a fluid silky black material that appeared to be constantly
flowing, like water made into cloth. I couldn’t tell her figure because even
though she was still, her body seemed to be in dancing on spot; or maybe my
eyes couldn’t focus on her. She was robed from head to toe, covered completely
save for her eyes. Her eyes. It was like
staring at the full moon in the dead of night. Round, rich and beautiful. They
held mystery, allure and danger. One glance was enough to tell me who she was.
“Am I
dead?” I whispered in a voice softer than non-existent breeze.
She seemed
to deliberating on whether or not to answer. She cocked her head to the
side and seemed to size me up, looking at me from top to bottom. Her eyes her
sly, calculating.
“No” she
purred.
Her voice
was like music; Violins singing a melody that would wreak havoc on any heart.
“But you
will be” she continued.
There was
no threat in her sentence. No malice. It was a fact. I inhaled sharply at her
comment but felt no pull of air. My lungs were empty. I stared down at my body
and realised that I was burning. No, not burning. Burned. My skin was ragged
and bleeding, flesh and bone exposed. Blisters and purple bruises blossomed on
me. The effect was actually quite artistic, if not somewhat macabre. Despite
the chaos that was my being, I felt nothing.
“I’m dying”
I said, feeling the gravity of the words as they held new meaning to me.
I couldn’t
remember how I got in this state, or my name for that matter. I had no past,
nor would it seem a future. Nothing held importance but the now.
“Who are
you?” I asked, willing my voice more strength. The answer was on the tip of my
tongue. I knew exactly who she was, but fear forced me to feign ignorance.
She stared
at me with a shrewd expression. Her eyes twinkling as she looked on. She was
waiting for me to answer.
“Death”
Neither of
us said the word, but I knew it to be true. Had I gone insane? Was this really
happening. Nothing made sense, yet I didn’t seem to care. I knew why she was
here and that was all that mattered.
“You know”
she sung in her voice, as if she was responding to my thoughts.
“A deal” I
said curtly, losing all my fear. I knew now what she was here for, and that
after we were done I would be dead. There was no point in fretting over the
inevitable.
“I wonder”
Death said, as she moved fluidly to the side, her body seemed to be made of the
same watery black material. “What would you surrender to return back to the
living?”
“Return?”
“Walk among
life once more” Death explained with a soft murmur. Her words rolled of her
like honey.
I pictured
it then, but I knew why I was dead…or dying.
“No.”
“No?”
Her word
seemed to linger in the air. Sweet and seductive. Every fibre of my being
screamed to protest, but I had to hold fast.
“No” I
repeated, forcing out the word with conviction.
“How noble”
Death teased, her eyes scorching with both danger and allure. “What if then,
you could save another?”
“You soul
is mine!” Death explained coldly. I felt a chill that had nothing to do with
weather. “But your body cannot follow”
I didn’t
get where she was going with this.
“How far
does your nobility extend? What if I could lessen your…ordeal…on the other side?
For a trade.”
“What would
I be trading?” I asked hesitantly. What left did I have to offer?
“Your body
is just a house for your soul, but it needn’t be that specific.”
My brain
was finally clicking into place. “You want to put another soul in my body?” The
whole idea seemed pointless.
“Do not try
to fathom death.” She said in a voice barely louder than a murmur, but it rung
with the solid clarity of thunder.
“ A father
of four died in the same explosion that took you” Death explained “But his time
can be extended if you allow it”
“No”
“An orphan
on a field trip” She continued like she hadn’t heard my answer “ Her life cut
short by cruelty…or saved by compassion”
“No” I
repeated, the word felt wrong in my mouth.
“A brother!”
Death said with a flash, the sky seemed to mirror her excitement. I hadn’t
noticed it before but now that I did I couldn’t tear my eyes away. Black heavy
clouds bled into the red sky. It looked like the gold of a sunrise but angrier,
more vengeful.
“A brother”
Death repeated “Whose only crime was to have the good intention to surprise a loved
one on their birthday”
My still
heart leapt to my throat.
“Picture a
man being called into work on a weekend; His birthday no less. Frustrated and
angry, his brother decides to surprise him at work. But behind the scenes,
death was bubbling to the surface. Who could honestly say what it was? A faulty
gas line? A flash of lighting? A terrorist? In that moment, hundreds died”
The scene
was very easy to picture. I could still hear the phone ringing. I could still
feel the resentment as I trudged my way to work. The flash of light still
burned my eyes. The taste of ash and blood still filled my mouth. All of it was
so fresh, so vivid.
“Why are
you doing this?” I croaked; my voice hoarse with pain I would never feel.
“His body
was ruined beyond recognition, but yours is still so full of life” Death said,
ignoring my question. “He can walk back into life if you allow it.”
“All he
needs is your yes” Death said in a hiss. The words ran through me like electricity.
My brain
felt numb with stress, but no pain followed. It was odd to have so many
emotions running through me, without my body to feel them. My heart should’ve
been pounding with such ferocity that it threatened to explode out of my chest,
yet it was as still a rock.
I could
picture him; Fragile, human and so full of life. Wave after wave of grief
rocked my body to the core. It pained me that I would never get the time to
mourn over him; but maybe, I could offer him the courtesy that was denied to
me.
I stared
into Death; watching the black fire that was her eyes. Her body so fluid and
ever shifting, yet perfectly still. Was
all of this true?
“You said
you would lessen my ordeal?” I asked, remembering her proposition. “How?”
Suddenly
her face was serene. All the malice that it once held was gone. There was no
beauty, no allure and no danger. All emotion was erased; save for one, tranquillity.
“Peace of
mind”
Her answer
was wordless; but I heard it echo all around me.
Knowing that
my brother would be saved; that he would get to live again. The thought was
beyond comfort. It was a bliss. Whatever I had to endure on the other side, I
felt that I would be able to bear it.
My lips
parted and I forced the air out, making sure that I articulated the word perfectly
so no mistake could be made.
“No”
Thunder and
lightning broke the sky. The earth exploded with a deafening roar. The winds
screamed and howled with an unnatural fury.
Death stood
there in the midst of the chaos; her face still perfectly serene. The
juxtaposition was frightening.
“Why?”
Death asked softly, but we both already knew the answer.
“How could
I face myself knowing that I robbed my brother of a deed so selfless…If the
tables were turned; I wouldn’t be grateful for what he did, I would be heartbroken;
living in a world where meaning lost all gravity.”
I listened
to myself make the speech. All around me the world seemed to quiet down; giving
me the silence to think.
“Do you
think he would see me as selfless…or selfish?” I asked, wondering more to
myself than to Death.
Death
walked forward. Her body was more graceful, more fluid in motion. She held out
her arms and pulled me into a hug. Her embrace was warm and light; like the one
my mother used to give me before going to work.
“You can
ask him yourself”